I may not achieve much...but I will always be a stealth drunk ... Or as society will call it an alcoholic.
I'm onto cider at the moment, I can even get away with drinking at work.
At the moment I'm proud and happy, this could be the cider talking but I believe it is the stealth drunk!!
I have just managed to convince someone that my bottle of drink is in fact ... Apple Tango ;) see that is genius right there!
I sometime wish I could go back in history to when all the bad vices were socially acceptable, let's go smoke opium, in hale dodgy chemicals to get high...wake up and have a nice shot of bath tub gin. I'm sure no one then moaned about obesity and asthma!
Back then you got seriously ill! The plague or something equally deadly. Now people moan and bitch of they get a slight pathetic cough.
I think the more bad stuff you have actually helps...I mean vaccinations are basically just injections of viruses so your body can battle it.
I shall attempt to keep this view when my kidneys fail and/or liver. But I know atleast I'm not getting hayfever/asthma.
Better health = better life ... Bollox
Friday, 2 July 2010
Saturday, 29 May 2010
The Moral Of Disney...occording to Ashley
A basic outlook on what Disney teaches our kids...from my perspective.
Snow White
So women, if you're beautiful...someone will be jealous and want to kill you.
Men, if you see a woman in the forest and she's "dead" its ok to kiss her...necrophilia rocks!
Cinderella
Women, you can clean a whole castle and still smile and sing...even go to the ball. Oh and its completely safe to run on glass shoes.
Men, if you're a rich prince all women will want you.
Lady and the Tramp.
Women, its ok to date tramps
Men, you can be a tramp and still get the lady, as long as you have some spaghetti handy.
Sleeping Beauty
Women, that spinning needles are irresistible to you, and you must touch it.
Men, you can kiss that total dead stranger chick...its fine! go on do it! she'll love it
The Little Mermaid
Women, its ok to give up everything you cherish and change our body drastically to get your man!
Men, women have nothing important to say so go for the quiet one.
Beauty and The Beast
Women, appearances dont matter...unless youre the girl...in which they do...alot
Men, Women digg anger
Aladdin
Women, why bother giving your opinion, you have to get married before anyone cares.
Men, LIE! its ok she'll forgive you
Ashley on Twitter
Snow White
So women, if you're beautiful...someone will be jealous and want to kill you.
Men, if you see a woman in the forest and she's "dead" its ok to kiss her...necrophilia rocks!
Cinderella
Women, you can clean a whole castle and still smile and sing...even go to the ball. Oh and its completely safe to run on glass shoes.
Men, if you're a rich prince all women will want you.
Lady and the Tramp.
Women, its ok to date tramps
Men, you can be a tramp and still get the lady, as long as you have some spaghetti handy.
Sleeping Beauty
Women, that spinning needles are irresistible to you, and you must touch it.
Men, you can kiss that total dead stranger chick...its fine! go on do it! she'll love it
The Little Mermaid
Women, its ok to give up everything you cherish and change our body drastically to get your man!
Men, women have nothing important to say so go for the quiet one.
Beauty and The Beast
Women, appearances dont matter...unless youre the girl...in which they do...alot
Men, Women digg anger
Aladdin
Women, why bother giving your opinion, you have to get married before anyone cares.
Men, LIE! its ok she'll forgive you
Ashley on Twitter
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